FAMILY
The memory of your child react- ing to the news you and her dad are divorcing – whether sobbing, begging or stony silence
– is something you carry forever. I hope you never have to
experience it.
But this article isn’t about
why you shouldn’t divorce, or
what to do if your marriage is
in trouble, although I believe
many marriages can be saved.
Instead it is about how to help
your kids thrive after a divorce.
Children of divorce experi-
ence higher rates of divorce
themselves, depression and
suicidal thoughts (especially
in males), increased likelihood
of dropping out of school,
early sexual activity, shorter
life spans (by five years) and
greater incidence of stroke
(particularly among men).
But those awful statistics
don’t have to be your reality.
Parents can greatly improve
their kids’ chances by focusing
on the goal of stability.
Most divorce studies agree
you can help protect your
child from the common risk
factors and by doing so hugely
alter the outcomes. Risk fac-
tors include poverty, unstable
households, conflict between
parents and a diminished
capacity to parent effectively.
Protective factors, on the
other hand, include co-operative parenting, authoritative
parenting style, household and
economic stability, and supportive sibling and extended
family relationships.
HELPING CHILDREN AFTER A DIVORCE BY ALEX NEWMAN
STABILITY IS THE KEY
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